Embarrassing Bodies.

Embarrassing Bodies

Now if my boobs were saggy

and drooping to the floor

Why would I disregard the doc

And go on Channel 4?

I think Doctor Christian's lovely

A trouper, he's the best

But there's no way I'd allow

A huge lens pointing at my chest

They claim they're too embarrassed

To let their GP see their lumps

They claim they're timid, shy and scared

Old fashioned, bashful frumps

But if your willy's warty

And your fanjita has a smell

There's a quiet little room

Where in private you can tell

Everything there is to know

No matter how obscene

Without ten million viewers

Staring at the screen

I'm guessing they get paid for it

Or is that a supposition

Scalpels, stirrups, pokes and prods

In unnatural positions?

I think I'd keep it under wraps

I'm not that desperate to be rich

But of course there's nothing wrong with me

Just an irritating itch